Headline: Doggie Diapers and Duct Tape
No, this is not an S&M thread. I don't even know how to spell seques anymore so this isn't R rated.
A few nights ago, after the weather channel predicted "partly cloudy" for a couple of days, I went and crawled into my cozy bed. Gypsy (my pooch) settled down next to me. It had been more than partly cloudy. It was cloudy as hell and pouring rain for a few days.
Lucky thing that my sons went up top on the RV and put awnings over the slides-outs before the rain hit. They wanted to make sure the slides wouldn't leak if it did rain----which it started doing the next day, sure enough.
All's well that ends well, right? Well, this rain didn't end for three days. It poured buckets around the clock. Then my son's wife came down sick with some kind of terrible bug and my neighbor did too, too. That didn't worry me. I'm resourceful, intelligent, and independent. I believe in "working well without supervision" so aside from hoping I didn't get sick, I was really snug, warm and secure.
Back to hopping into the cozy, snug bed. I'm a night owl and stay up till the wee hours most of the time. When I did go to bed, Gypsy snuggled up and I waited for sleep. Suddenly, though, Gypsy sat up and stared at the other side of the bed. I wondered what she was so intent on. I didn't want a big spider or mouse in bed with us. When I sat up, I felt sort of a mist in the air. I felt the ceiling and all around---all bone dry. But then I noticed a wet patch up by the pillows on the other side of the bed.
Gypsy never goes potty anywhere but her potty papers She only weighs about 3 pounds, so that works out fine. I don't have to go out in the cold with her. That's especially nice since there were cougars eating people's cats on the other side of the road a couple or three weeks ago. I'm a long-time cougar lover but I don't want to push my luck by bringing little-tiny-old-lady-and-little-tiny-dog cougar snacks out in plain sight. Especially at night.
Back to the story---
Sometimes when Gypsy drinks cold water too fast, she'll burp and some of the water comes back up. I almost blamed her for the wet except that she can't get up on the bed by herself and she'd have had to be on the bed to spit up water. Well, just then a big fat drop of water plopped onto the wet spot on the bed. I found the source---it was leaking----(still pouring rain from the partly cloudy sky)---so being this intelligent, innovative and independent woman who "works well without supervision" I thought---hmmm, I have electrical tape and puppy pads so if the puppy pads work for Gypsy, they'll work for this.
Let me back up to something I'm crestfallen and embarrassed to admit, since you know how intelligent I am, right? I first tried taping a bowl up the the place where it dripped, but that looked really stupid. What if I died? What would it do to my image if I were found with a bowl of water taped to the ceiling? I'm old you know and on borrowed time most likely. So then back to the hmmm electrical tape and puppy pads thing. I was carefully taping a puppy pad to soak up the leak when all at once, another big plop of water dripped on the other side! So when I got done taping up the puppy pad in the first spot, I taped another one on the second drip spot, crossed my fingers, went back to bed and was almost entirely asleep when about a cup full of ice cold water hit my back. Electrical tape isn't very reliable for such important things. UP I got again.
By this time I'm texting the problem to my sick son because I know he turns his phone off at night but wanting him to see my dilemma when he woke up which is earlier than I wake up because this was an urgent problem..My final text was "just have somebody brings me some Pampers and duct tape. I've got this. Don't worry about it---just send somebody with diapers and duct tape". It was after 4am by this time so it didn't matter too much if there were drips on my bed.
Okay, finally he brings his sick self over with doggie diapers and duct tape. Goes up top to see why there's a leak. Turns out putting the tarps up on the slides so they wouldn't leak created holes in the roof from the screws. I'm embarrassed for my sons, but hey----so I took the doggie diapers, which have a tail hole by the way, and used the wide wonderful duct tape to patch the the tail holes and get the diapers situated to catch the drips so I could get some sleep. I then made my bed across the foot of the bed and got some sleep.
When I woke up, there was a HUGE wet place in between the two doggie diapers. The damned slide wasn't leaking in the other two places anymore, it was leaking bigtime between them. I patched that up, same as before and everything is fine. The diapers look dumb but I'm not going to take them down for awhile. When I checked to see if my bedroom needed its diaper(s) changed, they were bone dry. My son had put a tarp over the leaking slide out awning till the weather dries up enough for a silicone application or something. But those doggie diapers are going to stay there till next summer, just in case. I'll pray the lower level slide-out doesn't start needing diapers but if it does, I've got duct tape and a couple more doggie diapers but I want PAMPERS next time!,
And then the next day, I flooded the upper level as described in the last issue. Stay tuned because you never know-----
A few nights ago, after the weather channel predicted "partly cloudy" for a couple of days, I went and crawled into my cozy bed. Gypsy (my pooch) settled down next to me. It had been more than partly cloudy. It was cloudy as hell and pouring rain for a few days.
Lucky thing that my sons went up top on the RV and put awnings over the slides-outs before the rain hit. They wanted to make sure the slides wouldn't leak if it did rain----which it started doing the next day, sure enough.
All's well that ends well, right? Well, this rain didn't end for three days. It poured buckets around the clock. Then my son's wife came down sick with some kind of terrible bug and my neighbor did too, too. That didn't worry me. I'm resourceful, intelligent, and independent. I believe in "working well without supervision" so aside from hoping I didn't get sick, I was really snug, warm and secure.
Back to hopping into the cozy, snug bed. I'm a night owl and stay up till the wee hours most of the time. When I did go to bed, Gypsy snuggled up and I waited for sleep. Suddenly, though, Gypsy sat up and stared at the other side of the bed. I wondered what she was so intent on. I didn't want a big spider or mouse in bed with us. When I sat up, I felt sort of a mist in the air. I felt the ceiling and all around---all bone dry. But then I noticed a wet patch up by the pillows on the other side of the bed.
Gypsy never goes potty anywhere but her potty papers She only weighs about 3 pounds, so that works out fine. I don't have to go out in the cold with her. That's especially nice since there were cougars eating people's cats on the other side of the road a couple or three weeks ago. I'm a long-time cougar lover but I don't want to push my luck by bringing little-tiny-old-lady-and-little-tiny-dog cougar snacks out in plain sight. Especially at night.
Back to the story---
Sometimes when Gypsy drinks cold water too fast, she'll burp and some of the water comes back up. I almost blamed her for the wet except that she can't get up on the bed by herself and she'd have had to be on the bed to spit up water. Well, just then a big fat drop of water plopped onto the wet spot on the bed. I found the source---it was leaking----(still pouring rain from the partly cloudy sky)---so being this intelligent, innovative and independent woman who "works well without supervision" I thought---hmmm, I have electrical tape and puppy pads so if the puppy pads work for Gypsy, they'll work for this.
Let me back up to something I'm crestfallen and embarrassed to admit, since you know how intelligent I am, right? I first tried taping a bowl up the the place where it dripped, but that looked really stupid. What if I died? What would it do to my image if I were found with a bowl of water taped to the ceiling? I'm old you know and on borrowed time most likely. So then back to the hmmm electrical tape and puppy pads thing. I was carefully taping a puppy pad to soak up the leak when all at once, another big plop of water dripped on the other side! So when I got done taping up the puppy pad in the first spot, I taped another one on the second drip spot, crossed my fingers, went back to bed and was almost entirely asleep when about a cup full of ice cold water hit my back. Electrical tape isn't very reliable for such important things. UP I got again.
By this time I'm texting the problem to my sick son because I know he turns his phone off at night but wanting him to see my dilemma when he woke up which is earlier than I wake up because this was an urgent problem..My final text was "just have somebody brings me some Pampers and duct tape. I've got this. Don't worry about it---just send somebody with diapers and duct tape". It was after 4am by this time so it didn't matter too much if there were drips on my bed.
Okay, finally he brings his sick self over with doggie diapers and duct tape. Goes up top to see why there's a leak. Turns out putting the tarps up on the slides so they wouldn't leak created holes in the roof from the screws. I'm embarrassed for my sons, but hey----so I took the doggie diapers, which have a tail hole by the way, and used the wide wonderful duct tape to patch the the tail holes and get the diapers situated to catch the drips so I could get some sleep. I then made my bed across the foot of the bed and got some sleep.
When I woke up, there was a HUGE wet place in between the two doggie diapers. The damned slide wasn't leaking in the other two places anymore, it was leaking bigtime between them. I patched that up, same as before and everything is fine. The diapers look dumb but I'm not going to take them down for awhile. When I checked to see if my bedroom needed its diaper(s) changed, they were bone dry. My son had put a tarp over the leaking slide out awning till the weather dries up enough for a silicone application or something. But those doggie diapers are going to stay there till next summer, just in case. I'll pray the lower level slide-out doesn't start needing diapers but if it does, I've got duct tape and a couple more doggie diapers but I want PAMPERS next time!,
And then the next day, I flooded the upper level as described in the last issue. Stay tuned because you never know-----
Comments
Post a Comment